Merry Christmas

Hope everybody has a good one.

We're going to the G'pas for Lasagna (mmm).

Be safe, tell someone you love them, and take some time to appreciate what beauty surrounds you.

-KL



Obviously the best part of Christmas--getting Fred Meyer's Black Friday Sock Sale socks. Cottony-goodness.

A rooftop crow's nest in a sea swell.

Ketchup blog.

I'm lying in my bed, bundled in blankets, contemplating whether or not I should walk to my next destination. Sadly enough, Refinery was cancelled for tonight due to snow we got over the weekend. It's not even all that bad out anymore (though it is threatening to snow again). Yet, people don't seem to plan their church meetings over how I feel about it. I know, right. Anyways, I'm really bummed that it's cancelled because Refinery is the highlight of my week and we're already taking the next two weeks off in order to celebrate Christmas and New Year's with our families. Priorities....psch, whatever. At least I won the consolation prize (I just now realized the basis of that word. huh.) and am going over to the Shupe's for a needed game of Monopoly. So at least that should be fun. Well, unless the girls start dominating and the boys get all pouty (although some of them are working on it more than others). I think I'll walk. Warm jacket, gloves; set.

I have finished two finals, two to go. Today was probably the most daunting. Two essays, two hours, I read maybe half the material. I think I did pretty well, even though I basically just did bulimic studying and filled the entire blue book and then some with five minutes to spare. At least it's over.
I also successfully signed up for next semester, probably about a full month later than most students, but it's not like there is much to choose from. Good ol' WSU-TC, building up their repertoire slowly but not quite surely. If nothing else, it's always interesting to see what this school comes up with. I'll throw in mildly frustrating to boot.

Let's see, what else. Cuz I know everybody is anxiously awaiting updates on my oh so fascinating existence.
How about something nobody except somebody who doesn't even read this cares about:
Survivor. Bob shouldn't have won. Sugar should have. Corrin is a stupid cow that needs to, as Devin would casually put it, go play in traffic.
End rant.

If your name starts with M and ends with olly, or S and arah or any combination, then this may or may not be what you've been reading to get to. I did not physically attack a chair. I think all of the time I had to mentally prepare myself changed my feelings from an intense rage to strong disappointment. I respect the fact that she actually put herself out there and told me the truth. I realize now that she was very scared of how I'd react.
Time. A good friend and a terrible enemy.
So thank you Sarah, Molly and anyone else who prayed for me. She's really the one that needs it.

Also, just so it can be proclaimed in cyberspace for all to know: I hate Christmas music. Truly, deeply, with a passion. For the entire month, that is all iTunes has had on free music Tuesday and it really irks me. I always cringe the day after Thanksgiving and everybody suddenly feels the need to play "Jingle Bells", "Silent Night", "White Christmas" and all those other eardrum piercing songs that many artists try to make their own and fail and they don't stop playing this music until January. Seriously, thank you sweet Jesus for the CD player in my car and my ipod.

So that's about it. If you read all this, bravo to you. I am obviously still reeling from vomiting all of my accumulated knowledge on the povery in American history final this morning. One more day. I may or may not post more over break depending how lazy I am and how many boring moments of my life I can really muster to write about in a public forum.

Until then I wish you all hot cocoa, chapstick and healthy cuticles.
-KL

Odds.

Bet on them.

Meet Geraldine, your social worker.

Hello dear reader(s?).

This post is merely a request.
If you do not like requests to be made to you, especially over the internet, then pretend this is the end of the post and go about your merry life.

If however you are willing and able to do something for me, continue.

Request: Please pray for me.

Tomorrow, at noon-thirty, I am picking up a friend and we are having coffee, but more importantly, we are probably going to converse. Without giving too many details, I am about 99% positive that this person is going to tell me something I don't want to hear. Something bad.
I am going to need to be able to react with compassion and generosity (as I was smacked in the face to remember tonight, thanks God). I don't have much confidence I can do this. Not in this situation anyways. More than likely, I will stew in silence and not say anything for fear of screaming in a public place, or possibly attack the very chair I will be sitting on in brute and merciless force.

I am not looking forward to the (potential) disaster tomorrow brings and would radically appreciate your prayers.

Flabergastion awaits,
-KL


Attempt to lighten the mood...

Made out of Blood and Rust

Today was a good day.

Being three days into Thanksgiving break, I have thus far kept a successful record of putting off my Latin Civilization paper.
It's getting colder outside, which makes me want to do two things: walk around aimlessly--watching my breath, and curl up and read with some hot cocoa.

The past few days, I have also enjoyed spending time bonding with my tall friend, Maribeth, through our mutual enjoyment of certain television shows. One of which we watched tonight, was exceptionally awesome. Namely because it featured the one-and-only Seth Green (now whenever I think of him, I see him chasing Molly into the Franco's yard, so thanks for that). Although he was only on for about 3 seconds, it made our voices squeal when we saw his name in the opening credits.

Besides discovering that Claire is becoming orange like Lindsey, we also decided Gesa needs a new marketing direction, how gun shot wounds bring families together, why black people don't shop at Old Navy, and I informed her what owning a cell phone really says about a person.

Have you hugged a panda today?



-KL

SlamQuest Epilogue: Warm Showers & Dry Socks

I feel inclined to write a retraction of a former blog in which I said I was going to die. That didn't happen as I'm sure everybody knew it wouldn't. I am also proud to say I did not kill anyone either. Although there were some close calls involving certain people invited to be leaders doing as little as possible to prove that they were worthy of such a title and some girls staying up way too late talking about--well, that's not important.
Alas, I have made a promise to myself to focus on the positive in this blog.

I did have a good time. I possibly even had a great time. Nothing completely earth-shattering or life-changing or all out spectacular, but in an entirely different way, eye-opening.

I feel pretty confident in saying that I've always been open, accepting, and patient especially when it comes to working with people, but lately God's really been showing me that there's a lot more to it. That I can't just tolerate certain people's existence, but I have to accept that they have their own ways of doing things, their own quirks, their own flaws and even gifts. Burning the candle to the wick, I can't do everything and I can't be everything.
He is amazing and deserves my focus.

And that's all I have to say.

Besides, Linnea just sent me a message to get off the computer and work on my paper. I love that she cares, even if it is to torture me.

-KL

SlamQuest Part 2: The Wait

It's all done.
It's all over.
And now we wait.
And wait.
For one lone parent who has no idea where they're going.
It's called following the car in front of you.
Trying not to be bitter, but when 34 are waiting on one, and energy and patience are running low it's hard to be anything but.

Just so I don't sound entirely resentful and pessimistic, I did have a good weekend. I love these girls.
More later--

KL

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SlamQuest Part 1: The Parking Lot

I'm gonna die
I'm gonna die
I'm gonna die
Rebecca, the rest of the 6th graders are nothing compared to Olivia Coppock.
Plus, it's already snowing in the mountains.
And there's already one person I did not expect (and am not really looking forward to).

Optimism
Optimism
Optimism
Let me be optimistic, please.

I'll be fine. Or the moon will be blue on the second Thursday in October...
Whatever happens first.
Molly--get the van ready.

KL

Posted with LifeCast

Reprieve

I leave for SlamQuest in 15 minutes. Well, West Side to be precise. But SlamQuest will soon follow.
I'm anxious. Scared, but excited. It's just a weekend, but it's a weekend in which I subject myself as leader to a group of middle-school girls. I'm sure it won't be like Ghormley. For one, there will be even more students. Hurray. Michelle will be there, but at last count, we were being seperated due to overwhelming numbers and overflowing cabins. That's a plus. So crowded there will be people on floors, but numbers also make it difficult for the students to focus, to concentrate and with such short time it's needed as much as possible.
The biggest let down to this whole thing is that WSC Youth Worship Band isn't playing, which is unfortunate. Last year was one of the highest points of worship in my life. It was one of the greatest "highs for Jesus" ever and I'm sure the whole team felt it. It drew us together even more and with so many new members, I wish we could have that experience again. But due to other events, it's not happening. This also means I'll more than likely be scoping out the band that is playing. A part of me hopes they're worse than us, so we can be right and feel even more resentment, but I know that's just the jealousy in me rearing it's ugly head. I hope they're good. I hope they draw the students in. I hope they bring us all together in praise of our King, because that is what this is all about.
So off I go. With uncertainty. Thinking about it now, I get nostalgic for summer. There will be no Kylan to wait for in the morning. No sharpie walri on chests. I may actually feel included b/c I have allies. (Although, Kylan, I do wish you were going.)
I think it's going to be a different experience and I'm excited.

I'm also going to be late....damn.

-KL (runs out door)

Coherence is Overrated

Today has been amazing.

I have had:
1 mug black tea
1 mug green tea
1 mug coffee
1 giant can Arizona Green Energy (which I wouldn't recommend unless your tastebuds are discombobulated)
1 mug of weird orange "effervescent C" stuff

My bladder flowith over.
Although I'm pretty sure half of the liquid is coming out of my nose instead.

Anyways, besides my sinuses being full of viscous lead and using half the box of Costco Kleenex, I'm doing well.

Getting lots done such as watching random youtube concerts, reruns of "Super Sweet 16", and an episode of "Engineering an Empire". Yay. I'm enjoying it, just feeling like accomplishing nothing.
I also don't think I'll be able to make it to practice for worship which is in about two and a half hours. I actually kinda like that idea. Thinking about it, I don't believe I've missed a single one in all two years that we've been doing this. And I know why.
Hmm. We'll see how it goes.

I actually do have some (possibly) worthwhile things to blog about, buuuuut I don't really think I am capable of being very serious and non-sarcastic right now. So deal with what you've got, or don't. I'll probably be back on in the next few days to write about one of the serious topics--if I can wrap my brain and emotions around them that is.

-KL

Oh, and don't bother writing, "I hope you feel better soon" and stuff like that b/c I will probably feel better tomorrow or Sunday at the latest (fingers crossed, thumbs pressed). A sick blog is probably not what anybody wants to read, but I won't apologize for putting it up. Nobody has to read everything I write. If that were the case, we'd all be in trouble.
So take care and I'll try not to pass this virus virtually.

Mini-Sausages, DVDs, and Testosterone

Seriously. I need some friends that are girls.
Seriously.

I do not understand why a level 65 Hunter needs the "bow of righteousness" or why Rogue is better when they use shadow casting or whatever. Ok, truly, I probably do understand it, but I don't really want to have a ten minute converstion on it.

Anyone without a penis want to come to some movie nights?
Although the dirty jokes are aplenty. ;)

I don't really get the physics of urinals either...
probably for the best.

Night After Sidewalk

My first class was cancelled today, so I have an ample amount of time with which to type as they didn't see it fit to send the email sooner than twenty minutes before class starts and therefore give those of us who don't live on campus the time to realize there is no class so we don't have to waste our energy rushing to get to said non-occuring class. Alas, I now have three hours of time to spend at glorious WSU TC before my next amazing class of the day. And to think I didn't want to get out of bed this morning?

On the last blog I posted, I asked for prayer with worship. To whoever read that and prayed, thank you. Friday and yesterday, anyway, were much better. Actually, God answered two of my biggest prayers in quick and concise ways. Love! My first huge concern was that I wasn't a leader. Now I know when I say that, it probably either sounds like I'm super conceited and egotistical--which is probably true--but I felt that being officially recognized as a "leader" in the full sense of the word would help with authority issues that I seem to have with some of the students on the team and well, actually maybe one of the adults as well. I'm in that awkward limbo-land area where I'm not "old" and official and paid to be there so I'm not viewed as a leader, but at the same time, I'm not in high school, friends with almost everyone on the team and could totally do something else with my time (I don't know what, but I sure as damn well could). Plus, I've been there pretty much every single Friday and Wednesday since this program started two years ago and I was leading worship solo an entire year prior to that (my indignity surfaces). So last week after an awful worship session at Refinery, I wrote an email to Michelle (finally) voicing all of my concerns, but I edited it before hitting the send button and removed the part about my desire to be named a leader and join in their secret meetings in which they sometimes make decisons about the program that I don't know I agree with 100%. Michelle responded to my less resentful email basically agreeing with me and asking if I wanted to be an official leader. Jake and she felt that after being a Trainee for the summer, I now have the skill and responsiblity to be a leader. I'm pretty sure I had that before summer started, but I'll take what I can get.

This is getting kinda long, I know. My hypothesis is that because I don't talk much, I write more. Either that or the fact that I have no friends. Kidding. Somewhat.

Second answered prayer: After making me a leader, I was informed that I would be leading next week's (tomorrow's) practice by myself. Oh sweet Jesus. I guess I do already lead Wednesdays all by myself (Eric Carmen anyone?). Nevertheless, I was a wee bit scared. Then last night during prayer requests, Michelle laughs and tells me Sarah will be there. Goody! If nothing else, more than one leader is required to help keep the surplus of participants on track and focused. That is hands down our biggest issue.

So worship and I are doing better. We haven't worked out all of our issues yet, but slowly I hope to get there. I want to make this relationship work. And I still have my Takamine and Jesus waiting at home for me after my group worship spirit has left me.

Well that ginormous blog killed about half an hour. Only two and a half to go. Illegally downloaded tv show time? I'm thinking yes.

Oh and to those of you struggling with decisions and perhaps the answers from God that come with those big decisions, read Romans 12:12. Seriously, my new favorite verse. Saves in a pinch.

-KL

So Much For So Little

I really love days like today. It's pretty much the epitome of a fall day. The sky is gray, it's sprinkling rain on and off, the leaves are caught half-way between green and orange, it's still warm enough to wear short-sleeves (although I am wearing jeans), class got out early. Love it.



Although I wouldn't want days like this all the time. I'm sure I'll grow sick of them by mid-to-late-October, but for now I really appreciate the beauty that comes with a cloudy day.

I was going to post an entirely serparate blog with the following topic, but now that I'm here, I might as well keep on.
We are two weeks into Refinery/BASIC. It's going swimmingly (<-I don't know exactly what that means, but I felt like it applied. edit: dictionary.com says it does). In other words, it's going really well. After literally TONS of self-debate and going over the two groups I have opportunity to work with, I choose to stick with Refinery for Wednesday evenings. I will be with HS on Wednesdays, but still spend quality time with my mid-highers on Sundays at Sunday School and Catalyst. I think it's working out majestically.
Some small difficulities arise when I get nostalgic and think about my small group last year. That was an unbeatable group. But this year is good too, just in different ways.
However, the real problem I have with Wednesdays emerges with worship. I won't go into the details, because it would be a huge rant full of negativeness. If you would, please pray for it and for patience and understanding. I am facing major burnout with it and I do not want worship to hold that place for me or any of the students.

Well, I think it is now time to watch some ANTM before my next class. Hope you're having an awesome 2nd day of October.

-KL

Not Really Scared

As many cliche teenagers around the continental U.S. say, "Music is freaking amazing, dude." As I am a cliche teenager, I make that statement in confidence.
It's always so much easier to find oneself in music than anywhere else...at least I think it is.

some choice lines that are on my mind:

It’s times like this I think too much
It’s times like this I think too much
Oh please don't think too much

Cause I can’t let you in
Cause these walls have been built

But you said I’m out on a ledge
Come stand with me
I need the company
I need the company

And panel by panel
And piece by piece
This all fits together but its not what you think
Oh there I go again
Oh there I go again

You said I’m out on a ledge
Come stand with me
I need the company
I need the company and
I'm trying to get you in
I'm trying to get you over and
I'm trying to be brave
I'm trying to be brave
This is me trying to be brave

If anybody out there can name this song, or at least this band without using a search engine--cheater--then you are my new best musical friend.

-KL

Where the World Drops Off

I have made a new resolution not to sit at the table while they are having a "discussion" about money or the house.
Dinner is not the time or place for that. Truly I wish there was no place for that. Between his loyalty laying in the national economy and fear of total collapse and her inability to see from anybody else's perspective, the result is quite unpleasant.
I wonder if this is how other children feel. That always other 50%.
Like many other things, it will probably only get worse before it gets better.
I'm worried more about Ben than about them. Thankfully he now has a used-to-be-homecoming-date-and-now-I'm-pretty-sure-she's-his-girlfriend to help him out. He needs that.

I pray that this all gets finished quick and that, if possible, we all come out more or less unscathed. If nothing else, this has given me an amazing opportunity to immerse myself in faith and in Him. May I remember that.

12:12

Future > Present

So why should I worry?
Why do I freak out?
God knows what I need,
You know what I need.


What do I need?
Whatever it is, I think I could use it right about now.
Help me to sell everything I am for what I've found.
Invade my heart, invade this broken home.

Romans 8:18-26
Help us in our weakness, intercede, that we may be brought into Your glorious freedom.

Glorious Freedom

So, it's Saturday evening. I'm watching a movie with my parents, my brother and his future-homecoming-date-but-not-yet-girlfriend-though-he-wishes-she-were. I'm not really into the movie, The Bucket List, and thus I am typing this.

The past couple weeks have been: blah.
Go to school, come home, read, watch tv, do whatever else I can to pass the time.

However, things are finally starting back up. After an unbearably long break, youth worship team has started again. Begin drama fest...now. Seriously, there is pretty much nothing more dramatic than youth worship team...well, other than a few choice middle school girls (some of whom are joining the team this year, so I rescind to the former).
Mid-week bible study is also starting in two weeks with leader training next week. I cannot necesarilly put into words how excited I am for this to start. So I won't. Just know, I'm stoked.

Molly, this part's for you, because you asked:
My grandpa is doing better. My dad got him into an assisted living facility. The condition I couldn't remember he has is Parkinson's. He's a proud guy and my dad was really worried that putting him in a place where he would be monitored and get lots of help would make it really tough, but he seems to be doing really well. The problem now is, while he was over there, my dad noticed that Claudia, his stepmom, is probably in even more need of care than my grandpa. Her mental capactiy is just not there. She couldn't figure out how to start the car, turn the lights on or what she had/hadn't told my dad. But dad's trip ended and he came back and told her daughter to go see her and see what she thought of the situation. This week, he got a phone call from where my grandpa is staying telling him that Claudia needs help and if nothing gets done soon, that they will call Adult Protective Services. So he will probably go back to HI within the next week or so and there are a whole lot of other things involved in that but this is already really long...
In other Molly news, I have pretty much mastered Your Love is Strong. I love it. Although I have to put it up half a step b/c even my voice is not low enough to reach Jon's. Anyways, thank you so much for showing me that song.

To everyone else reading this, I wish you were here. Yes, here watching the movie with my mom and Ben and his...'friend'. But alas, you are not here, so I hope that wherever you are, you are exactly where you need to be and that in being there you are having a great time and living life to your fullest potential. Yes, The Bucket List is almost over.

For world peace and pandas everywhere
-KL

Thus This

If I were to blog about Tuesday classes, it would be pointless.

Posted with LifeCast

Damn Sand Ninjas

If I still wrote emo poety, I would post some here tonight. Thankfully, I passed through that phase a long while ago--rather quickly.

This week, all three days of it, has been mundane and trivial. Yay for a college lexicon.

Walking back onto campus on Monday officially closed the door on summer. It really hit me after attending my classes for the day. I felt as though no time had passed between May and now. I simply transitioned from one set of classes to the next. There was no time in-between. There was no summer. No new friendships. No learning and discipleship. No life-changing exeriences. The entire eight weeks, possibly the best in my life, seemed like nothing more than a dream. Albeit, there is little evidence that it ever existed in my 'new' day-to-day life. All I have are the memories, which I'm afraid I cling to way too much. Ok, I went a little too far into myself there. Few steps back. Better.

Things I miss the most:

1. Beginning my day with awesome people and God.

2. Ending my day with awesome people.

3. Sexual innuendos and people to laugh with me at them. Srrsly. There have been sooo many this past week and nobody to shoot me knowing glances.

There are many other things I miss, but I need to move on.

Other items of non-joy in my life:

I took my computer in to get serviced (I cannot be a college student without wi-fi and have a brother that IMs girls for hours on the only other computer in the house) and longish story shorter, it's gonna die. I need to get a new one. Begin surfing web pages for hours, now. I spent about three hours today browsing and have it narrowed down to whatever Best Buy has. So much for a summer's worth of house-sitting...plus. Thanks WSU and Lockheed-Martin for your second-hand junk. Love you too.

My dad is back from Hawaii. After much stress and days of searching for answers, my grandpa is finally in an assisted living facility. He seems to like it. He's a proud and vocal guy, so hopefully he'll stick with it. It also costs about two to three times as much as mainland facilities. I'm not sure if my dad's paying for it or not. From what he's told us, it sounds as if my step-grandma is also not doing well. Her mental capacity is severely declining. There are some funny stories to go with it, but mostly it's just sad. Her daughter is going to visit her in the coming week and see what needs to be done.

On a happier note, only 15 and 1/2 weeks until winter break!

I think my main problem is that there is nothing going on for me right now that gets me involved, that makes me feel like I have meaning. No church youth activities start until the end of September. That's really where I need to be. At least, I think it is. We'll see when the time comes. Until then, I don't know.

Well, I'm sorry this post is really just me harping on everything that is getting me down right now. We all have times like that, no? I'm sure things will be fine in a bit. Until then, I've just got to find something to do. I really want nothing more than to invite people over to my house-sitting place to watch a movie and make cupcakes. Is that too much to ask?!

If you've stayed to read this far, I will leave you with a reward--something I randomly found on the net...just for you.

Another Reason Why

Today I decided to stress myself out immensely by locking my keys in my car. Ok, so I didn't plan this out. I would have to be more twisted emotionally than I am to do that. But I did, nevertheless, lock them in the ignition whilst in the Walmart parking lot.

As soon as the door closed and I took a step away I realized it. Also, unfortunately enough, I had decided to lessen the open space of my windows and roll them up to a mere inch from the door. Had I not done this, I think it would have been easy to slip my hand in and pull up the lock.

Trying not to panic, I go in the store and figure that if nothing else, I can look for someone I know and ask to borrow their phone (ironically enough, my mom and I were talking about trying to get a family plan this morning).

As I'm walking through the bitter-white aisles, I remember the last time I did such a talented thing and how my dad used a metal coat-hanger to open the door. I proceed to find said hangers in the ginormous store that I rarely visit. (That's the other thing that was making me mad at myself, I was there for no reason, I was just bored and in the neighborhood.)

I finally found a section of hangers and picked out the cheapest set of metal ones. I bought them and walked out. I unwound the end of the hanger and straightened it out as best I could. I'm sure I didn't look suspicious at all approaching a car in the middle of the parking lot and shoving a metal hanger down the window.

After a few failed attempts, I backed away for a moment. So many people were coming in and out of my area and I didn't want to look super guilty or get called out for seemingly trying to break into a car. So, I walked around for a bit. Tried my luck with the coat hanger again and just all around frustrated myself.

As I got more and more pissed at myself, I remembered something I had learned, in the previous weeks especially: Whenever possible and whenever needed--pray. I did. I prayed for help and strength and patience. I also prayed for the courage to approach somebody I didn't know and ask for help--something I'm not good at doing even with people I know really well.

After failing a few more times with the hanger, I went back inside. I steered myself towards customer service, where I was sure there would be some sort of phone for me to use. There, of course, was a line and I turned around in frustration and embarrassment. As I turned, I literally saw the answer to my prayer.
There in the check-out lane across from me was Wendy P., the amazing office lady from the church I worked at all summer.

I quietly approached her and after a brief "how's it going" conversation, I asked if I could use her phone to call home for an extra set of keys. I was instantly calmer and at peace (though thoroughly embarrassed). Over the phone, my mom was not quite as calm as I was. She couldn't find the spares and had to call my dad in HI.
Wendy gave me a ride home, where my loving brother laughed at me for my mistake. We eventually found the keys and Ben gave me a ride back to my car.

I know I'll be able to look back at this incident and laugh, but more importantly, I'll be able to look back and see how God was working in the situation and how He answers prayers (in really awesome ways that I never expect). I'm sure He was easily laughing with me as well.

-KL

Beginning with Good-bye

Being my first blog ever (on blogspot anyways), I feel it is necesary to start with something dramatic:

there is a spider on the wall.

Could you feel the tension mounting?

No. Really. I do have something to say that does delicately pull at my heartstrings. Within the last few hours, I have said good-bye to some of the most amazing people. Some I will see again soon. Others, not so much. Though I will miss them all very, very much each day that they are gone.

Things will NOT be the same without them. I won't be able to get in my car at 9 am on Monday for school and not want to automatically go the opposite direction to the church. I won't be able to walk into the WSN narthex without wishing there were 7 other people sitting on the couches, waiting for something to do. Sitting relatively by myself on Sunday mornings will be hard as well. When certain songs that begin with "There's a place that I love to run and play" come up in worship, I will have to giggle to myself and silently sing it to Molly and Sarah. Other things that won't be the same: ultimate frisbee, not having something to do every night of the week, making costumes for puppets, seeing Faye and not having 7 other people shout her name in unison, tampons, cupcakes, walking to/from the Center, and so much else.

This summer has been absolutely incredible. It has also been extremely hard. I can't believe it's over. Seems like just last week we were awkwardly sitting in a van, not talking, as we travelled to Campbell Farm. Trying to comprehend that you all will not be in my life on a daily basis is unfathomable. Well, other than John.

In many ways, I think it's harder staying here. Just because so many things will be different. Even the other people staying here will have a different feel to them. They will no longer be the committee to me, or I the Trainee to them. The kids will still be kids, but they won't necesarilly be "mine."

Well, I'm tired of being all melodramatic. And definitely tired of crying. For tonight anyways. I'm sure tomorrow will bring fresh tears.

Srrsly though. To the 7 of you, should you ever read this. The 7 of you who made this summer amazing, who made me laugh harder than I've probably ever laughed, who made me feel loved every moment I was with you, who grew with me in this awesome adventure: THANK YOU.
Damn it, I'm crying again.
No words could ever describe how grateful I am to you and how much I love each and every one of you.

May God bless you and keep you safe and bring us back together again...someday soon.

KL (Knitting&Latch-hooking)